The Right to Write Me Off

17 Jan

30 Posts of Truthiness Question Number Four: What is something you have to forgive someone for?

Today’s post is about forgiveness and to be honest, forgiving people? Not really something that I do. Seriously, I can hold a grudge like a rusted-shut bear trap. So I really had to sit down and think about who exactly I need to forgive.

Do I forgive Bee for ruining what was once a semi-decent (“semi” being the key word) body?

Do I forgive Bug for throwing up on me daily, including today on my beloved iPod?

But I decided to do something on the blog that I don’t usually do:

Get serious.

You see, there seems to be some confusion recently so let’s clear this up once and for all: this is a humor blog.

As in, if you don’t have a sense of humor, please feel free to click that little X in the right hand corner of your window.

And as such, there may be a sprinkling of, I don’t know, JOKES posted on this blog.

Some may be crude. Some may be offensive. Hopefully most are funny.

But that’s me. THIS BLOG is me. I’m loud, offensive, inappropriate in mixed company and, again, hopefully sometimes funny. Yes, I’m crass but I’m honest. I’m loud, but maybe a bit funny. In your mind, I may push the envelope, but if no one did, the world would be pretty damned boring, wouldn’t it?

And if you know me in real life and you don’t think I’m all of the above, you must be blind, deaf, and maybe just a little bit mentally handi-capable.

Just know one thing: I don’t write this blog to push the envelope. I’m not trying to stir up controversy in order to get a few more readers. And if I use the occasional “bad word” or twelve, it’s because that’s the way I speak in the real world when I’m not working and/or at Bee’s preschool.

I know that this blog isn’t for everyone. I know that I’m not for everyone. And this is where the forgiveness comes in.

Don’t ask me why, but I always really want people to like me. Not in a “I’m the center of attention oh oh look at me” kind of way. I just want to be everyone’s friend. I want to be a good friend to you, too. Not a “talk shit behind your back unless I can be your hero in a time of need” kind of friend, either. A real, genuine friend.

And if you don’t like me, it kills me. I don’t need everyone to be my BFF, but I hate it when I find out that someone doesn’t like me. I mean, why? I’m pretty goddamn awesome! (<-- that'd be a joke for those confused. Please see above.) Even if I don't like the person...scratch that...even if I really dislike the person, I still want them to like me. And the blog, for that matter. Just knowing that there is someone out there putting out negative thoughts in my direction (or even worse, recruiting others to think poorly of me as well), well, it just eats at me.

But I’ve realized recently, that it’s okay.

I don’t need everyone to like me.

In fact, it’s okay if people really don’t like me. Especially if I don’t particularly love them either.

It’s okay.

And I forgive you.

You don’t have to like me.

If it makes you feel better, you can go on thinking that I am a distastefully, cruel and unfunny person who will soon suffer the wrath of Karma.

I forgive you.

Just know that I am none of those things. And if you think any of that of me, then you don’t know me at all.

It’s just too bad you never really tried.

Song title: The Right to Write Me Off by Amber Pacific

8 Responses to “The Right to Write Me Off”

  1. Arla-Shay January 17, 2011 at 8:55 am #

    Handy-capable? It’s differently-abled. Keep up.

    I wouldn’t worry too much about an occasional troll not liking you. Plus,I love you enough for a kabillion friends/blog readers so you don’t really need the humorless in your life anyway. ;)

    XOXOXOXOXOXOX,loveaffair,XOXOXOXOXOXOXO!

  2. Kassia January 17, 2011 at 9:27 am #

    I like you and NOTHING else matters!!
    :)

  3. kr January 17, 2011 at 11:44 am #

    Things that make you go Hmmmm?

  4. sissy2mom2bee January 17, 2011 at 6:36 pm #

    Ditto, Arla-Shay!
    Trolls sucks. Especially the ones who just won’t go back under the bridge. You know who you are, ’cause you keep reading this blog….

  5. Arla-Shay January 17, 2011 at 7:50 pm #

    LMOA, Sissy!

  6. Erin Wilson January 17, 2011 at 7:54 pm #

    I’ve liked you since I first met you and, even after reading your poop and vomit stories, STILL like you. Maybe even more now.

  7. Midori January 18, 2011 at 8:22 am #

    I love your writing – please don’t ever stop! There’s a shortage of sarcastic humor in the world…I need to know there are more like me out there.

  8. Melisa January 19, 2011 at 2:55 pm #

    Some people have nothing better to do. Chalk it up to them being jealous. You can be you and are okay with the you, you are. They probably blog under a pseudonym and are still afraid to be themselves.

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