The Bitch Is Back

29 Dec

Hello, Lovies!!


It’s me!


I know, I know, I’ve been MIA for like, well, FOREVER. But good news! The bitch is back, baby!

After having a head cold for roughly two months (no, that is not a typo) and Cletus the Fetus slowly and steadily sucking the life force out of my body, I finally feel like a human being again.

Mind you, still a pregnant human being, but one that can type on the computer for more than five minutes without becoming comatose and wanting to crawl in to a hole and cry until I die of nausea and exhaustion.

Needless to say, the last few weeks have been aaaaaawesome.

And can I say something else? If you can at all plan around it, DO NOT get pregnant right before the holidays. I think I counted like EIGHT events that I had to do sober, including Mr. Bee’s company party, which unfortunately I was too pukey to attend anyway.

Which, by the way, turns out to be an easy way to tell people at work that your wife is pregnant. I imagine just saying that your wife feels like throwing up when she thinks of the company Christmas party doesn’t go over as well if your wife isn’t pregnant…

Anywho and whatnot, this week should be full of party recaps: Santabator, The Kidnapping (or Batornapping) of Santabator and his eventual return, and the glorious and hilarious Glitter Extravaganza Party!

So stay tuned, bitches!

Song title: The Bitch Is Back by Elton John

3 Responses to “The Bitch Is Back”

  1. Rachael December 29, 2009 at 8:31 pm #

    I have one friend who likes wine, and it prevented her from keeping either of her pregnancies a secret, people were immediately like ‘why aren’t you having wine’? Ha. Welcome back.

  2. Erin December 30, 2009 at 8:57 am #

    Totally missed you!

  3. Erin January 9, 2010 at 10:01 pm #


    Do you read Cake Wrecks? I am so obsessed with it. I am cracking up hardcore. This post reminded me of something you would say:


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