Take a Picture

23 Jun

Yesterday, I wrote about my recent weekend trip down to Sacramento/Folsom. I just can’t believe that I forgot the best part.

The photos!!

So this was trip #3 (I think) for Bee, but it was really the first time that she has been aware enough to know what is going on. I won’t lie; I was terrified that she would lose her shit the minute the plane took off.

We eventually got her safely hog tied secured in her car seat on the plane and she was fairly entertained by all the people. Unfortunately, on the way to the airport, Mr. Bee and I had entertained Bee by singing the ABC Song at the top of our lungs, just for fun. When we tried to entertain her while the passengers were boarding with the same song, guess what she did? Yep, she started screaming it at the top of her lungs. Slightly embarrassing, but hella funny.

When we took off, Bee decided that clouds were apparently the devil (she looked out her window a few times and turned back to me and very seriously said, “Clouds scary.”) so we quickly did what any parent does to keep their kid busy. We turned on some television.

Let me just take a minute here to express my undying devotion and appreciation for the Apple Corporation. We would not have survived both plane trips with our sanity if it wasn’t for my new iPod touch.

I had already loaded that puppy with Bee’s television lineup (Backyardigans, Wonder Pets, Word World and Super Why!) and once that plane went DING! I had that shit in Bee’s lap before the pilot could even say “We have now reached our cruising altitude of yada yada yada…”

Look at that grin!!

Needless to say, she enjoyed it just a smidge. Look at that smile on her face! The most hilarious part is that I started the Backyardigans episode first and, since Bee had on headphones and couldn’t tell how loud she was being, when the show’s theme song came on, Bee began yelling in excitement, “Pablo! Tyrone! Tasha! Uniqua! Austin!!!!!”

Yet again, I was dying of laughter (and embarrassment).

At my grandparents’ 65th wedding anniversary, Bee continue to be both a doll and an embarrassment as she yelled “more dance!” between some hulu dancers my uncles had brought in to entertain my grandparents. But she also did do her own hulu dancing outside, so once again, her cuteness saved her (and me) from more humiliation.

One of my cousin’s little daughters was just as, if not more, hilarious. My grandmother had gone to some random dollar store (I assume) and bought a bunch of miscellaneous toys for the kids to help themselves to. My cousin’s daughter (who was about 13) grabbed a couple dolls that she thought looked cute. Once opening them, she was more than a little, well, confused…


The first question is: Why the hell did I not finish my cake?! But that is neither here nor there.

More importantly: What the hell is the character on the left (my best guess is a convict reoffending by stealing a 1980′s boom box?) and MOST importantly: What do these toys DO?

You’ll notice from the convict toy that you can pull them apart slightly. The kids would pull them apart, set them on the table and patiently wait for something to happen…


Well, let’s take a look at the directions on the back of the package, shall we?

Pull up? Push down?

Shittiest. Toys. Ever.

Luckily we had other things to keep us amused. Like some of the outfits that people wore to this shin-dig. Well, one outfit in particular.

Unfortunately, I only have one photo that somewhat demonstrates this guy’s, let’s say, QUESTIONABLE clothing decision.

Wear do you find a hat like that?

I know you can’t tell from this photo, but this dude was wearing a white polo, a white bowler with a purple feather in it and…wait for it…matching PURPLE pants. I’m even gonna go out on a limb and say that he was wearing white shoes, too.

I’m a little worried that this geezer misread “Come celebrate our 65th Anniversary” for “Please come to our pimp themed party”. Luckily, I was dressed kind of slutty, so we made a good pair.

Song title: Take a Picture by Filter

3 Responses to “Take a Picture”

  1. sissy2mom2b June 23, 2009 at 5:48 pm #

    Ewww… don’t forget that girl that was wearing that flowered skirt and white t-shirt. Ooops, sorry that was you. :( JUST KIDDING!

  2. Kristen June 24, 2009 at 9:37 pm #

    So you took the carseat on the flight? See everyone is telling me to check it. We will fly with Beanie for the first time next month. Maybe they don’t understand my child doesn’t like to sit down for 5 min, much less 5 hours! I think I’ll take your advice and strap her down.

    I like the Ipod touch idea too. I was thinking of getting a portable DVD player, but i’ve been wanting a new Ipod anyways…

  3. Aunt Becky June 25, 2009 at 11:34 am #

    I just want cake.

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