Yesterday, I had a dream.

It was a simple dream…

See, yesterday was supposed to be the first Tuesday in months that my Mommy’s Morning Off was actually going to be OFF: No doctor, No therapist, No acupuncture.

Just me, the laptop, Panera and the blog.

In my dream, you, my lovely reader, would have already finished a hilarious post that made you pee yourself laughing while simultaneously stroking your junk heartstrings with it’s common-every-woman-ness.

But my jacked up, hot mess of a body had other plans for me…

Monday morning I woke up with a swollen and painful right eye. I forced myself through the day, but by Tuesday morning I decided to call my eye doctor when I looked a little too much like this dude:

So instead of my sweet little blog ménage à quatre, I spent the morning being driven to the eye doctor by Mr. Bee and being diagnosed with an eye infection.

But the most super awesomeness of it all?

Now I get to spend a week in my glasses, having been banned from wearing my contacts.

“So what?” you ask, innocently. “You’ll just look like a nerdy, hot librarian for a week. Deal with it.”

Well, true, my friend. But…

But…

My glasses are like one tiny prescription below where I need them to be. So that means I’m more of a squinty, confused librarian.

Oh, AND when we moved last, apparently I thought the safest way to pack my hardly-ever-used glasses would be to wrap them in diamond-crusted sandpaper after grinding them in to some gravel and letting two drunk cats with sharpen claws bat them around for a few hours.

My point?

They are scratched to hell and back.

So while this week didn’t exactly turn out as I had planned, at least I can spend my time hunkered down in my house dreaming about a non-infected next week.

Fingers crossed.

Song title: Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood