Hot in Herre

11 May

Okay, first off, I have to apologize for this post not being a run-down of this weekend’s fabulous Vegas debauchery, but there is some awesome shit going down.

If you had been obsessively stalking me and reading each and every comment that pops up on my posts (which obviously you were because, duh, this blog is kind of awesome, dontchaknow), you would’ve seen this from reader Sarah (thanks, Sarah! We love you!) from last Friday:

You are being discredited on the ABC Bachelor board because of your Bachelor blogging. They say you made it all up.

What the what?!

Needless to say, I dropped lounging by the pool in the hot Vegas sun everything I was doing to get online and find out exactly what the what was going on.

Upon hunting down this ABC message board devoted to all things Bachelor, I finally track down some totally random post about Molly giving some interview on the radio (because we care? There’s really a message board for this stuff?). Somewhere, halfway in, the topic comes around to Jason picking his nose or something else completely friggin’ random and my blog is brought up in to conversation.

One retard 40 year old virgin loser commenter decides that I, unlike Wikipedia, am not a reliable source for, well, anything apparently.

Here are a couple snippets of fabulous things that were said about me:

Here’s the bio on this “woman” who started this website and her “credentials.”

” I’m a married not quite 30-something with a clinically diagnosed addiction to television and the internet.”

This person is about as credible in knowledge of how ABC works as a rock. C’mon, I know you are more intelligent than this. She gives her “opinions” in this article, full of vulgar language, just like she was on a message board, months ago.

Okay, first of all, somebody needs to visit The “Blog” of “Unnecessary” Quotation Marks. Seriously, “dude”.

Secondly, what is this person talking about? I don’t do message boards, okay? I prefer to lurk in the shadows, thankyouverymuch.

Any intelligent and unbiased person is going to look at this “woman’s blog and see someone with issues. What is the purpose of this site? She is a whack job.

Clearly, I have never made an attempt to hide my whack-job-ish-ness. I mean, just check out here, here and here, just for a start.

Oh, and dude, you missed a quotation mark there. Good work, though. It’s hard to go completely cold turkey with that shit.

I don’t think this woman is a good writer or interesting at all. In fact, I could only read so much before it became mind-numbing, eye-glazing and downright worthless to me. If her opinions mattered, she would be “somebody” in the media. Someone with integrity, intelligence and good writing skills. She doesn’t appear to be any of that.

Wow. Really, just wow.

Okay, this “mom blogger.” really? This is who we should use as our expert and final analysis? A mom with a child who gives her opinion to us, whether we asked for not? A mom with a child who met someone one time. Okay.

First I’d like to remind everyone that I posted on my own personal blog, not this precious message board, so who knows what the hell he/she/it is talking about.

Secondly, “expert and final analysis”?

Excuse me a second while I laugh so hard that I shit myself.

But really what I’d like to address is the use of the phrase “mom with a child.” Somehow this douche, on Mother’s Day Weekend, for Christ’s sake, manages to use “mom” as a derogatory term. Really, though?

But he/she/it is totally right. I mean what could I possibly have to offer anyone in society since I am just simply a “mom with a child,” who couldn’t possibly have enough education or intelligence to post 148 times in the last three and half weeks on a message board about a dating reality show, like this particular commenter.

In the end, the final “opinion” from this “mom with a child” “blogger” with “vulgar language” to our ever vigilant message boarder?

Thanks for giving me something to chuckle at this weekend.

Oh, and fuck you.

If you want to rubberneck the situation (as I have been doing all weekend – much to my own amusement), check out the thread by clicking here.

Song title: Hot in Herre by Nelly

11 Responses to “Hot in Herre”

  1. Yaya May 11, 2009 at 3:52 pm #

    Ok, WOW. While at first I was offended for you, I then realized, Holy Shit!!! You were TALKED about! You’re somebody! Wow! Seriously, I’m jealous. I’d rather be gossiped about than not talked about at all.

  2. Pearl Wisdom May 11, 2009 at 3:55 pm #

    Dude, that’s awesome. At least you are not like some crazy vulgar “mom without a child” (thanks for clarifying what a “mom” is, “dumbass”).

    Seriously, this is why I stopped blogging… the potential for scandal is just too great.

    Okay, really Im just jealous. This is so cool.

  3. Mama Bee May 11, 2009 at 4:02 pm #

    LOL! You ladies are totally right! About two seconds after reading the message board for the first time, I reported back to my friends “HOLY SHIT! This is AWESOME!!!” :) hahaha!

  4. Kristen May 11, 2009 at 5:10 pm #

    I love that some crazy dude thinks you blog is noteworthy enough to mention on the message board. Haev to admit I’m a tad jealous too. Just a “tad.” lol

  5. Lindsay May 11, 2009 at 5:36 pm #

    I pretty much “love” this “guy” who thinks “your blog” is where the “final” word on the Bachelor lies. And also, I “love” that he is on the Bachelor “message board” while you are in “Vegas” sipping drinks by the “pool”.

  6. Robin May 11, 2009 at 6:19 pm #

    “Good work, though. It’s hard to go completely cold turkey with that shit.”
    Sounds like it fell right out of my mouth. A woman after my own “heart”! :)

  7. Jaci May 12, 2009 at 5:49 am #

    Ugh, I absolutely hate the chat room freaks who find a blog post and jump all over it. But holy shit! Your chat freaks are totally psycho!

    I’ve been talked about (very briefly–nothing like the crazy shit you went through) in a handful of chat rooms. I think losers just scour google searches looking for anything slightly related to what they’re talking about, and then plaster the link for all their loser friends. My latest link was in a Natalie Portman fan/stalker chat room, because I jokingly said she could play me in a movie if she gained 60 pounds and stretch marks. It was a freaking BLIP in a post about my marriage, nerds! Get a grip!

    Posting hundreds of times about The Bachelor? (teehee) Oh, those crazy cat ladies. :)

  8. Betts May 12, 2009 at 7:54 am #

    “give your opinions whether we asked for it or not”?

    I think by visiting your blog and reading, we’re asking for it.

    When you rich and famous with all your writing deals, I’ll be president of your fan club.

  9. Mrs. J May 14, 2009 at 10:13 pm #

    Yeah as Pearl “said” I’m glad they clarify what “a” mom is. Thanks for your expert “and” final analysis, “asshole.” Even the 2nd time around this story is hilarious…I mean “this” shit never “gets” old”.”

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