Gonna Make Changes
22 Oct
The other night I did something that I swore I’d never do.
All my friends and family would say that this is the last thing they would expect me to do. I’ve always held on tightly to my deep-rooted beliefs and the fact that I went against them this week, well, it’s disturbing to me and everyone I love.
I could use a lot of excuses to explain my behavior.
I was bored.
It just happened.
I was drunk.
It was a chemical attraction and I couldn’t fight it.
It was just one time.
It didn’t mean a thing.
It wasn’t personal; it was simply physical.
But none of these reasons excuse what I’ve done.
Mr. Bee, needless to say, was shocked, to say the least. I could just tell him to get over it, but it’s totally reasonable that he would have a reaction to what I’ve done.
Will I have regrets? Probably.
But it wasn’t a personal thing. It was strictly physical.
And man, was I tired afterward.
So what if it was only 12 minutes of walking jogging on the treadmill.
I EXERCISED, PEOPLE!!
That’s right, you heard me. I, Mama Bee, who is best known for her Eat-brownies-and-ice-cream-while-watching-The-Biggest-Loser Diet Plan, actually climbed on to the treadmill yesterday for some “me” time.
And by “me” I really mean “what the fuck was I thinking”.
You are probably shocked and asking yourself, “But Mama Bee, how do you maintain those adorable love handles and ferocious muffin top without exercising?!”
You know, I’ve just been blessed.
Blessed with a shape like a teletubby, that is.
And just so you know, getting to the treadmill alone was quite a task.
It pretty much goes without saying that this room doesn’t get used very often. Unless it’s as a dumping ground for random crap.
So after fifteen minutes of Indiana Jones-esque excavation, I finally climbed aboard that mother fucker and hit “Start”.
And then I realized what horrible shape I am in.
At one point I even had pain in my right shoulder and figured that it was either (1) my joints reacting to doing anything more strenuous than changing channels on the TiVo remote, or (2) I was having a heart attack/stroke.
Honestly, the jury is still out on which one it is. Since I am regaining use of my left side, I’m guessing it wasn’t a stroke.
Despite the ramifications, I’m hoping to make some changes to our nightly routine to make some room for a half hour of exercise and/or “me” time every evening. And this time, “me” equals wine and a bubble bath.
I can’t take all the credit for the life changes, though. It’s actually crazytown doctor’s orders. And now that I might actually be “one of those people who exercise” (you know, those people I totally hate and think of while I’m shoving pizza or brownies or pizza topped with brownies in my face), please don’t judge me. You may find yourself in the same position in a moment of weakness.
Fight against it. You must be strong. ::fist in air::
Oh shit, Biggest Loser is on. Where’s the ice cream?
Song title: Gonna Make Changes by Phyllis Hyman
I’m impressed! My treadmill is sitting out in the open and I don’t go near it.
I walk around the neighbor hood twice a day, but lets be honest, too often I go to the coffee shop (and sometimes get a treat) and walk to the sandwich shop for lunch (and sometimes a treat). Not sure that counts as exercise.
Good work! Maybe I’ll get wild and follow in your foot steps…maybe…
mmmmm, pizza topped with brownies…
man, that’s a serious looking tredmill. does it double as some sort of air traffic control tower too?
I KNOW this is not the way we raised you. (Did you drive to the treadmill?)
Unfortunately, our treadmill is the only ‘me’ time I get these days. (Which also happens to coincide with nap time – who’da thunk?)
I am the same. exact. way. I look at my treadmill every day, then decide it would make me feel better to eat ice cream and watch some tv show. I need motivation – good luck to you on your exercise journey!
LOL! Your “exercise room” looks a lot like mine. I, too, had inspiration to jump on the elliptical machine the other day and I was pooped after, like, 5 min. I suck.
But, I will say, having a huge research interest in exercise psychology and having written a lit review on the topic, I think the doc has a good idea