Mom to Bee

Remember that Snow White-esque, naive girl who wandered through a flowering meadow towards a hernia repair, whistling some bullshit about “one day my belly button will come,” all the while the surgeon/huntsman lurked quietly behind her, waiting to strike. Okay, bad analogy, but give me a break. I’m on pain meds, yo. And remember that [...]

This time next week, I will be in warm Las Vegas for a long girls weekend with Sissy. I won’t have to be a mom. I won’t have to be a wife. I’ll get to be me. Just me. Well, me with a daiquiri. And hopefully a tan. Because Lord knows you do NOT want [...]

I totally wasn’t going to blog today because I’m super worthless, but I didn’t think this novel would be Facebook update appropriate. So I’m totally convinced that I’m have been impregnated with a vampire baby. Here is my reasoning: 1. I’m super sensitive to sunlight today. Now I’m going with the more traditional sunlight-kills-vampires theory [...]

Philosophy Orange Chiffon Bubble Bath: $22 Bottle of dessert wine: $13 Too Beautiful To Live Podcast: $0 A quiet half hour to myself: Priceless Song title: Some Enchanted Evening by Barbra Streisand

Last week, when Mr. Bee and I stayed at the Four Seasons Seattle for our Fifth Wedding Anniversary, I found my dream bathroom. I’ll give you three attempts to guess what my favorite feature of the bathroom was… If you answered C, Congratulations! You’ve won a shiny new pair of, well, nothing, but you’ve proven [...]

I am so sorry that I haven’t written anything in a few days but, as you will soon see, I have been a little busy with, well, everything. So to get out all my disjointed thoughts, I figured I’d do a little Blog Fart Friday/Saturday for you! 1. Mr. Bee Follow-up On Wednesday morning, around [...]

I just saw a news story about how the average Stay At Home Mom (SAHM) would earn approximately $125,000 a year if she was paid for all of her hard work. Guess what a SAHM (and Work At Home/Owner of Her Own Company Mom, thankyouverymuch) doesn’t want to hear after relaying the story to her [...]

Anyone else out there notice that the local playground looks like an apocalyptic scene from Mad Max? First, you’ve got the social breakdown that naturally occurs when 20+ children under the age of 3 are within 20 feet of one another. Next, you’ve got a Thunderdome-esque Big Toy that threatens to kill your 2 year [...]

At the end of this last week, Baby Bee’s super sexy boyfriend (can you say a toddler super sexy in jest without it coming across as disgusting and pervy? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Sorry ’bout that.) found out that he has, well, a temporary “condition.” Well, there’s no easy way to say this, so [...]

Alright, Interwebs, due to being as sick as a dog (whatever that means), having tweaked my back during this last weekend’s wedding, and just in general wishing that I could climb in to bed and not come out for a few days, I don’t have much for you today. Besides rambling. Rambling, I can do. [...]