Mom to Bee

I’m sure it’s been clear to my tens of readers that lately I have been kind of full of the writers block. Let’s be honest, I used to post at least four times a week and now I’m averaging… (does math in head) (still doing math) (resorts to computer calculator only to be distracted by [...]

To overcome my severe and debilitating writer’s block, last week I reached out to you, dear readers, on ideas to write about. I got a few suggestions… Arla-Shay suggested… Explosive diarrhea is always fun. Can I bring you a couple of bean burritos from Taco Bell? randomgiggles thought… The Twilight series – your thoughts about [...]

Along with my ability to eat, not throw up, and my will to live, it seems as though Cletus the Fetus has also sucked all of the creativity out of my body as well. That’s where you come in, my faithful tens of readers! I need post ideas!! What do YOU want to hear about? [...]

Wow. So apparently there are a lot of people out there that are offended by either (1) my disdain of Walmart, or (2) somehow talking about my vagina and spastic colon wasn’t as offensive as complaining about having an eye infection… Because I lost more than two-thirds of my subscribers two days ago!! WHAT THE [...]

I started my new book online. I’m going to call it “Don’t Be A Fucking Dumbass: Buy My Book.” Live and Learn Advice columns are hard, yo. Especially when you try to write one without the word “cuntbag” in it. Advice FAIL. Bad Advice Oh, Billy Mays. Where were you when this infomercial was made? [...]

So I’ve totally been in a funk the last week or so. There are many things I could blame it on: 1. Mr. Bee was gone on business trips pretty much all last week. That might explain my “Calgon, please take me the fuck away” Facebook updates all week. 2. I’ve fallen back in to [...]

After yesterday’s post to you asking you to have my baby because I love you so much (and we’d make some really cute babies, ifIdosaysomyself), I received so many questionable lovely comments! I feel like I should send all of you a beautiful restraining order Valentine or something. As a gift to you, I wanted [...]

I wanted to take today to thank you, my tens of readers, for being beyond supremely awesome. When I started this crazy thing called blogging, I never thought that anyone besides my Sissy and my Bunco ladies would ever read it. Fast forward about a year and a half later and I am still amazed [...]

…followed up with “Please Don’t Leave Me”! Welcome to all the lovely ladies (and gentlemen?) visiting today from SITS!! I am so honored to have you all visiting and hopefully I won’t be offending too many of you as you peruse my, shall we say, “colorful” blog. Some might say I use inappropriate language. Others [...]

Recently, some drama arose regarding a very old post, which honestly is such old news. I could go in to the sordid, dramatic details but rehashing the hurt feelings from my honest and, if I do say so myself, hilarious words would probably only make things worse at this point. But it does flow nicely [...]