Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me

12 Sep

Oh mah gawd, you guys. You seriously have to try this kid at school thing.

IT’S SO FUCKING AWESOME!!

Yesterday, I did dishes,

what?!

2 1/2 loads of laundry,

I’m only counting half of the load that I forgot about and is still sitting in the washer gathering mildew.

and…wait for it…I cooked dinner!!

((crickets))

Fer reals, guys, the last time I cooked dinner for my family was…well, let’s just say the kids may or may not have been in the womb.

And today, I was showered, dressed, and went on a 2 mile walk with Bug after dropping Bee off at school. And it’s barely 11 am!

In the name of full disclosure, my walk was to Starbucks where I ate and drank about eleventy billion calories to make up for my exercise. I wouldn’t walk to accidentally lose those extra 20 pounds that I blame on Bug. And, you know, brownies and shit.

I know I’m beating a dead horse here, but I’m seriously in denial that I get so much extra time each day to get shit done. AND this is like an every day thing!

Needless to say, when I daydream about two years from now when both crotch parasites are in full-time school, I wet myself a little lot.

Song title: Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me by Gladys Knight and the Pips

No comments yet

Leave a Reply

UA-5354347-4